Traveler’s Log- Day 1

6:15 EST wake up after ~4 hr slumber, get ready, take out dogs, rapidly enjoy leftover penn station vegetable mess sandwich

7:00 EST catch cab to airport, get left boob scanned for weapons, drink coffee, fumble with bags and straps and generally fret over the possibility of forgetting something.

8:30 EST fly to SLC. Sit directly in front of guy who doesn’t stop talking about how he’s from a farm in Wabash Indiana and he’s never been on a plane and is moving to california with two bags to see what happens and is hitting on the girls on both sides of him who are also annoying, have boyfriends and love Jesus. Alternatively doze and read Kindle.

10:30 MST deplane, experience time travel/jetlag(?) after moving 2 time zones. Flight and baggage claim were both faster than expected.

11:00 MST get to hotel, wait to check in, eat free chocolate chip cookie in lobby. find out this year’s room is somehow nicer than the room I accidentally got last year. Ponder the rules and potential cost of putting your own belongings in a mini bar. Test out tiny balconies without views of anything really. Delight in the fact that there is both a bath tub and a shower… Excited I remembered bath salts (the kind that relax you, not the kind that make you rip peoples faces off). Discover this room not only has robes but also slippers (I brought my own). The lounge/bar in the lobby has a harpist.

12:00 MST get lunch with Erica and Angie…  Walked to nearest possible restaurant. Thought we were going to a Mexican place but it was italian? Ate an overpriced tiny gluten free pizza named “what about bob” at a place unofficially called “Fat Kid Pizza”. The busboy was a dead ringer for Napoleon Dynamite. I remember how I enjoy Napoleon Dynamite jokes, references and sightings and hope that people still talk about that damn movie when I’m old and have nothing else going on. Ride rails with Angie to Smith’s grocery store which is like a two story hybrid of Kohls and Meijer and is 2 blocks away. Everyone local poo poos the idea of walking because it’s 100+*. Go on a honey shopping spree not knowing if I’ll bump into any more honey this week. Register for work meetings, get free book and polo shirt with directives to wear it Thursday, go back to room.

2:00-5:30 MST unpack, try hopelessly to get into daytime TV but it is terrible, take a 2 hour nap, wake up in a panic thinking OMG WHERE AM I???? (later I learned at least two other people I know had the same post nap sensation). Try the bathroom scale out to get a base line of 165.6# to see where a week of resort food will take me.

6:30-9:00 dinner and first meeting of the week…. wore a mod emerald dress with decorative gold buttons, pockets and taupe heels. Receive compliments on dress and “new” (the ones I haven’t broken yet) glasses. Observed a 5′ ice sculpture which declares WGU 15 and was said to be a gift from the excessively fancy hotel. Wait in ridiculously long lines for food. Make another friend named Angie. Listen to Christina complain that she ate lunch at the fancy hotel by the pool and they put avocados on her perfectly normal sandwich and a raspberry and orange slices in what he hoped would be a regular water. finally met and hugged the boss I’ve had for 9 or so months but never met. I like her. Get recognized for being a “rockstar” by my teammates. Eat a tiny slice of prime rib, small baked potato with bacon, cheese, sour cream, scallions, a salad, some grilled vegetables, two small wedges of mystery cheese (gouda and something with apples(?) in it), a cup of coffee with honey and cream, and one petite tiny chocolate mouse desert in a chocolate cup. Made a point to avoid the bread, excess meat, dessert grazing.

9:00-10:00 go on a walk with Lavender, Angie and Caron to the Gallivan Center park and back since it no longer feels like it’s 100* and we know all we’re going to do is sit and eat for the majority of the week. Sat on some actual plush green grass for a few minutes. See a fountain with a depressing sign that says “no one allowed in fountain”. Unlike my previous attempts at signage photography in SLC I was not yelled at while taking a picture of it.

Present time: Just about bedtime. There is chocolate in a little gold box on my bed, jazz music on the radio and the slippers and robe have moved here as well. Holy shit they brought me a bucket of ice. I wonder what other kinds of stuff they’ve niced up in here. I’m hesitant to touch anything because they make you put $100 hold on your credit card for incidentals. Word is to use the gym or hot tub you must pay $10 a day not that I’m interested in either of those things. 7:30 AM start tomorrow… Time to check emails and do “work” and sleep.

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